addicted to
i'm not here to win
i'm here to leave a legacy
it's the passion that drives you
endorphins
pain
exhaustion
chasing this insane dream
perfection
tagboard ;
guestbook
maybe we're bent and broken
we were meant to live for so much more
have we lost ourselves?
slept at 2.30am today. zzz. cos at 12 midnite i realised i'd forgotten to do my PQ. so yahoo i spent 2.5hrs doing it. haha. dunno why so slow. productivity greatly decreases in the wee hours of the morning. sigh. had initially planned to go for a run in the morning but when my alarm clock rang i was half dead. haha.
eegah :( feel quite useless nowadays. cos deep down i'm just this selfish brat who's all insecure about everything...
can't believe it's been more than a year already. as dates start to overlap it gets a bit scary. cos you start remembering all the "exactly one year ago"s. i want to know why things happened that way.. why i can't talk to her anymore..what i was meant to get out of all that..and what i'm supp to do with all this new stuff i'm reading/ learning about. i trust her a lot but i can't .. handle these things when i can't talk to her about things anymore.
i want to be happy and content and lead a purposeful life. meanwhile... i shall focus on being a less selfish idiot. i'm doing all the things that tore me apart when they were done to me. is it human nature to imitate past experiences so that you can get a kick out of doing it to others? rah totally disgusted with myself.
3 things i need most now:
sleep
run
more exercise
haha. stress= binge eating which is such a horrible thing to do to myself. I NEED AN ACTIVE LIFE. hoho.